for the birds

Okay so i haven't blogged in a long time, I don't know why other than my life doesn't seem interesting or I have no sarcasm left at the end of the day because i have used it these last two weeks spending 24/7 with my children. Yes I love my children with all of my heart but the three in the top picture have tested every nerve in my body today. We had a cold front so no swimming today so it was a BEAUTIFUL day outside and unfortunatley we had to spend most of the day at home b/c we were waiting for our cable guy who was so nice to give us such a wonderful time frame of 8-12, which he showed up at 1210, so nice... Anyhow I finally got Hayden down for a nap after and thought i would clean I turned the TV off, the computer (seriously) and folded some much needed laundry, 5 minutes into the triplets were tattling, fighting, throwing sand, playing in rainwater from the sandbox, and just doing everything to grate the nerves. It was not my proudest parenting moment, I called Christian a name that I should never have used, yelled for whatever reason I can't remember now, and am still feeling guilty about it. hmmm as I was talking to another mom with 4 kids she said she remembers when she was little overhearing her mom talk on the telephone saying, " i hate these kids" and she thought it was the meanest thing ever, which yes it does seem very mean but she also told me she can totally relate to how her mom felt at that time. I think of the word hate as such a nasty word, but I think we all have those moments where we dont' hate them but definitely hate their behavior. Geesh I hope i don't get reported on CNN for posting this on my blog but please try to understand me, I know my fellow triplet moms will,lol
Lately I just feel out of the loop, I mean how did i handle triplets when they were Hayden's age, I can barely handle him and the triplets, how did i deal with them being into everything, I just feel like I am not superwoman anymore, I felt like I could do it all and now I am lucky to get one thing on my to do list crossed off, is it that i am getting older, am I lazier, or what is going on. What happened to my time management, probably this damn laptop computer did,lol.
Tonight was dress rehearsal for the girls recital and Christian wanted to come with us so I let him, he was pretty good, actually did better than the girls while watching the other dancers, and while I was saying "sit down please, don't hit your sister, quit picking your nose, etc,
I sat down and wondered if I am expecting to much out of my 4 year olds? I get upset if they aren't their best behavior when out in public, which is totally ridiculous, i make a ton of mistakes daily so why do I get to make mistakes and not get punished but I will not let them have their snack or no TV for something that they didn't really do wrong. Arent I supposed to be teaching them and they are learning? I don't know if make sense but I just feel like the crabby mom who always yells and I need to relax and let them be kids....
anyway the pictures are of the girls in thier jazz costumes for dance, they are doing the "buzzy boogie song" and let me tell you tonight at rehearsal along with the other 3 girls had no clue what they were doing, they haven't had dance in almost 3 weeks and here I am slightly mad they dont' remember anything (hello what the heck did i pay for) when I came across my thought mentioned above, it has been 3 weeks, could I remember a dance routine and where to stand in a foreign place that is much bigger, no but its all about looking cute and having a good time. who cares if they are good at it, I want my kids to participate in sports or whatever they want, no they don't have to be good at it but i want them to at least enjoy it, and let me tell you all those girls tonight had big smiles on thier faces and they were having fun, while us moms were thinking "oh no" the bottom pics are from Disney at 1900 Park Fare, don't you just love chirstian's face this is his face in all of the pictures with a character, and the bottom is Hayden (my favorite, he doesnt' talk back and just loves his momma) he is such a happy kid, thankfully I have 4 happy kids so maybe I should try and be more happier of a momma to them....